Delicious History

Choosing a place to eat Chinese food in Tampa just got a little more difficult.  The public is about equally divided on the superiority of China Yuan or Yummy House, and the befuddled critics haven’t even tried to choose a favorite.  You all know I don’t shrug off tough decisions, but it would be expensive ande time consuming to sample enough of all three menus to make a definitive judgment. If I could secure corporate sponsorship, it would be within reach.  Probably an anti-cholesterol drug.

I think this calls for a group evaluation.  But this will be no simple clash between two Chinese dragons, but three!  (Insert exaggerated anime gasp here!)

The new Chinese dragon is Chopstix, which i stumbled across quite by accident.  I was attending a show at the Brass Mug on Fletcher Avenue.  My neighbor invited me to see his friend’s metal band play.  I arrived hungry and a little tipsy.  I walked past a storefront where a lousy Chinese fast food place had resided.  I discovered a new restaurant had opened in its place, and although it was late (11 at night), the sight of their empty restaurant made me want to like the place.  They invited me to sit down and sample the food.  Soon, various small dishes of food graced the table: steamed chive dumplings, a seafood and tofu hot pot, shrimp— like from the tank— with garlic sauce, and crispy milk balls— a milk custard battered and fried.  All washed down with jasmine tea.  (Sometimes I order oolong just because i like to say it.)  I was in heaven that night.  After the great food, the concert and flying headbanger hair rather bored me.

Brand new upstart Chopstix has some fire to breathe of its own in the upcoming tournament of Chinese dragons.  Opened in September by three siblings: Michelle, Eva and chef Stan Du.  For a man of just 28, his skills are impressive indeed and boasts of training in China as a young man and honing his restaurant kitchen skills in places such as T.C. Choy’s, a Hyde Park Chinese/Pan-Asian “Bistro” with prices higher than the quality of its food.  Down there, you’re paying for waterfalls, slick decor, and the “bistro” monikker.

After my first night of bliss, I returned a couple weeks later with some friends to sample the menu further.

The watercress soup was delightfully subtle, with sliced pork, soft tofu, and the namesake vegetable, which was cooked just right, not boiled to death.  The honey and black pepper short ribs arrived sizzling and steaming.  They did not disappoint.  The sauce was slightly sweet, and the white mushrooms were lovely in the dish.

The seafood and tofu hot pot was excellent, with shrimp, scallops, fish, squid, and a more firm tofu.  It also arrived steaming in a pan, with some folded Chinese newspapers to protect the plate underneath from the intense heat.  This was not a  giant pot of gravy, but all of the ingredients cooked immediately in the pan with a slightly spicy sauce.  So simple and so good.  This could be the best tofu I’ve yet tried.  Someone on Chowhound mentioned that tofu is normally like eating water, and I must concur.  The heat and sauce of hot pot at Chopstix improve it.

The beef with ginger and scallion stand up well to China Yuan’s, but lacks the large pieces of ginger that I love so much.  Then again, I like the ginger to burn my mouth a bit, and I imagine most people aren’t this fond of it.

Bok choy flowers out from a shitake mushroom to the right of the vegetable pan fried noodles.  The noodles varied between crispy and softened with the subtle sauce.  The baby bok choy with mushrooms were beautiful and glossy.  I loved the meaty texture of the mushrooms and the bok choy was perfectly cooked.

I returned again for a weekday lunch, and was disappointed to find only a menu of typical lunch specials.  I later discovered that I should have been given a regular menu as well.  The food was still good, but the lunch special menu was too limited.  If you have company, skip the cheap lunch specials and pay a couple extra dollars for the family style portions off of the real menu, which is quite extensive.

Call it what you will, a clash of the three Chinese dragons, or a menage a Chinese, but I look forward to comparing Chopstix, China Yuan, and Yummy House side by side.  It will probably feel a little promiscuous, but sometimes that’s okay in service of a good cause.

Without a doubt, picadillo is one of my favorite Cuban dishes.  It is easy to make, packs a lot of flavor, and is ideal for parties in a number of ways: it is relatively cheap, can be served as an entree over rice, in a sandwich on Cuban bread, in empanadas, and so on.

Like so much great food, picadillo is a simple dish with unclear origins.  One of the first times it was served was to the new emperor of Mexico in 1821, a fruity version with spicy pork served with walnut sauce inside a poblano pepper.  I’m not sure which detail was more surprising: that the dish was made with pork and walnuts or that the leader of Mexico ever held the lofty title of emperor.

Versions of the dish spread around Latin America.  It is especially popular in Mexico, Puerto Rico, and Cuba.  Today, we’re dealing with the Cuban version, which is replete with the tangy flavors of olives, capers, white vinegar, red wine, and capers.  I used the Columbia Restaurant’s recipe long before I became involved in documenting the restaurant’s history.  I tweak it to maximize my favorite flavors (the Columbia’s recipe does not call for capers) and cut down the fat content.

Once again, I bypassed the robbery taking place at a supermarket near you— Publix is a flagrant offender, regularly charging $3.99 a pound for red/yellow/orange bell peppers.  This dish requires a good deal of peppers, especially when you triple or quadruple the recipe as I usually do.

I went to the Sanwa market on Hillsborough Avenue, where prices are as low as three red peppers for one dollar.  Take that, Publix!

Start by cooking 2 pounds of ground beef until just done.  Drain pan of all but 1-2 tablespoons of grease and juices (add vegetable oil if necessary) and cook 1 cup diced onions and 2 bell peppers.  When they are soft but not brown, add 2 cups canned whole tomatoes, drained and chopped (or 6 medium fresh ones), and 2 tbl minced garlic.  I just added those ingredients in the photo above.  Stir and cook until most liquid in the pan has evaporated, about 5-10 minutes.

Now the beef comes back into play, seasoned with 6 bay leaves, 1 tbl dried oregano, 1 tsp cumin, 1 tsp black pepper, and 1 tsp red pepper flakes.  Throw all into the pot with the vegetables.  Stir and cook for about 3 minutes, long enough for the spices to wake up.

Next, we really start layering in the flavors.  Add 1/2 cup of pimiento-stuffed olives, 1 tbl white vinegar, 1/4 cup raisins, 1 small jar of capers, and 1/4 cup burgundy wine, cooking over low heat for about 15 minutes.

I usually add very little salt, as the olives and capers bring plenty of brine with them.  In fact, if i want to add salt, I just drizzle some of the olive brine in.

Simple and rustic, but full of balanced and sophisticated flavors, picadillo is a great reminder that most good food percolates from the bottom up.  This is not the stuff of fancy bistros, but is a respectable dish for company.  For a hearty variation, add some additional liquid, like tomatoes, beef broth, and wine, and simmer the picadillo with cubes yucca, potato, or mix in a little sweet potato.  If you want to go over the top, fry the potatoes.

I once ate a sandwich in Key West, in which picadillo had been encased in a large hollowed-out bun, sealed shut and dipped in egg batter, and deep fried.  I had to at least try the thing, but i didn’t expect it to be awesome.  It wasn’t.  Lame picadillo, and the deep frying  may have been novel, but it added nothing to the sandwich but a bunch of grease.  I probably had two or three bites, and ate a real dinner instead.

I’ve been putting the finishing touches on my book, The Columbia Restaurant: a Century of History, Culture and Cuisine.   I’ve been kept plenty busy with home projects as well, but it will soon pass.  The other night, I felt jolly and grilled some fine NY strip steaks with a teriyaki pan sauce with onions and mushrooms; I sauteed some green beans with garlic and sesame oil, and served brown rice on the side.  Sadly, I didn’t have a camera around.

That night’s food is not a good example of what I’ve been eating lately.  I’ve been driven by expediency, such as my concoction of frozen pierogies (potato and onion) topped with sauteed onions, Granny Smith apple, and ham.  With a little whisky thrown in with some melted butter, those toppings take on a nice flavor.  It may not be much to look at, but it works as a decent meal in under ten minutes.

Eating packed lunches at work doesn’t have to be a chore.  I try to make things that keep well and I want to eat, lest I be tempted to go out for lunch.  On this occasion, I wanted noodle bowls with stir fried vegetables, fresh herbs and veggies, and grilled teriyaki chicken.

First off, I strongly urge anyone who likes teriyaki to make the real thing.  It is very flavorful and a snap to make.  Combine 1/2 cup soy sauce (I use the dark stuff from asian markets) with 1/2 cup sugar, 1/2 tsp minced fresh ginger, and 2 minced garlic cloves in a small saucepan.  While the liquid heats up, whisk together 2 tablespoons mirin (a sweet Japanese cooking wine), and 1 tsp cornstarch until smooth.  Mix with  liquid in saucepan and bring to a boil over medium high heat, stirring occasionally, until thickened to a syrup.  I adapted the recipe from America’s Test Kitchen, which is perennially skimpy with garlic ande culinarily conservative in general.  I also added more cornstarch, as the sauce never seemed to thicken quite enough.

I then stir fried broccoli slaw with onions to toss with vermicelli noodles.  I added a bit of teriyaki, probably just a couple tablespoons, and a little vegetable oil with a kiss of sesame oil.

I grilled bone in chicken breasts that had been rubbed with a little salt and pepper.  Boneless chicken doesn’t hold up well to the intense heat of a grill and tends to dry out.  Kepe the meat moist is especially important if you plan on using it for leftovers.  A little glaze of teriyaki makes this bird special.

The finished product is part noodle bowl, part salad, with our cooked chicken, vermicelli and vegetables, and raw shredded cabbage, bean sprouts, red pepper, green onion, and a drizzle of teriyaki.  Although it looks a bit chaotic on the plate, it is a great meal that is great at room temperature.  Nice for a fancy dinner or a packed lunch you’ll actually want to eat.

I wrote this piece back in 2002 or so just for fun.  I miss the Palios Brothers’ fried chicken, and happy to still have Snack City’s ice cream— especially the coconut.  And the mango.  And the cashew-raisin.  And the ginger  (Snack City appears in Culinary Crawl Down Boliche Boulevard below).   The two friends depicted in this story are two of Florida’s top historians.

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Two friends invited me to accompany them to dinner the other day. One—whom we’ll call “Jimbo” to protect the guilty—had found the best fried chicken he’d ever eaten. I was not surprised when he said he found the best golden-brown bird at the Palios brothers’ fry shack on MacDill. Our mutual friend “Adam” is one of those poor souls condemned to eternal health food and rice cakes for medical reasons. The doctor makes the rules, and Adam’s vigilant wife enforces them.

Jimbo had learned that Adam’s wife would be out of town on this night and he discreetly called him to arrange our meeting. I fasted in preparation, and I’m sure my buddies did, too. Unfortunately for Adam, he had a doctor’s appointment the next morning, in part to have his cholesterol tested.

Walking into Palios—which is named after the brothers who run it—is like taking a few steps back in time. The board on the wall displays their entire menu, almost all of which is fried. Fried chicken, fried shrimp, onion rings, etc., all served with Cole slaw and French fries. For those wary of grease, they make a good Greek salad, too. The only proof that time has elapsed in the building is the prices on the hand-painted board. When decades of cost of living increases forced them to raise prices, the brothers nailed new boards over the old prices rather than paint them over again.

Jimbo and I started off with some great onion rings while we waited for Adam. We did not have to wait long—Adam could hardly contain himself. We ordered a big plate of chicken and Adam ate the crumbs of the onion rings directly off the table, relishing the only grease he’d tasted in many months.

Then, the chicken arrived and we dove in. The most striking thing about Palios’ chicken is the slightly burnt flavor that lends a bold heartiness where there normally would be simple breaded saltiness. The best fried chicken is not uniformly cooked, but has slightly burnt edges around the browned surface. Although I suspect it is deep-fried, their chicken tastes more like it comes from mom’s cast iron skillet, and everyone should know that taste at least once.

Before long, we sat wiping the grease from our lips, eyes rolling back in bliss. Adam could not resist eating the crumbs from the table once again. We had not even finished lavishing praise on Palios’ fried chicken when Jimbo suggested another indulgence, ice cream. “The place looks like a 7-11,” Jimbo said of the store he had in mind, “but they have great Cuban ice cream. Do you want to go?” Without a tinge of guilt, newly-liberated Adam nodded, and we were off, a two-car convoy on a classified mission to indulge in Cuban ice cream.

Snack City is a simple-looking store, an utterly unremarkable structure at Howard and Columbus that one can drive by without so much as a glance. Even inside, the building looks slightly run-down with a few tables and a counter. The robust, friendly man behind the counter had just finished taking an order for one hundred one-gallon buckets of mango ice cream from an Indian gentleman. “People from India are crazy about mangoes,” Jimbo quipped. When asked about the ice cream, the Indian gentleman said simply, “It is the best I’ve had.” His massive order would supply a party he planned on throwing. Images of a vast ice cream orgy sprung to mind, except that the participants would be fully clothed and the moans would be mango-induced.

There are many flavors to choose from, but Jimbo insisted we try the maméy (pronounced ma’am ay) flavor, derived from a Cuban fruit of the same name. Maméy is considered to be Cuba’s national fruit, and looks somewhat like an avocado with a red interior. The ice cream resembles a pink sorbet, with a subtle and intriguing flavor, somewhat like guava and not too sweet. After hearing the Indian man’s praise, we tried some mango as well. The mango and maméy contrasted each other in glorious fashion, but shared qualities delicate and delicious, light and refreshing. Cuban ice cream is neither as sweet nor as creamy as its counterpart here in the U.S. Unlike the decadence of American Heath Bar Crunch and Cookies ‘n’ Cream flavors, Snack City offers ice cream made with dignity and restraint that seems to touch off subtle possibilities instead of cloying extremes.

We thought we’d done it all at Palios, but Snack City offered something more exotic and slightly less sinful. Once again with our eyes rolling about, Adam and I thanked Jimbo for the generous invitation to explore Tampa’s culinary delights.

In parting, Adam said, “After all this, I think I’m going to reschedule my doctor’s appointment.” He rescheduled the appointment for one week later. His cholesterol went through the ceiling, but it sure tasted good.

For entertaining, there is nothing better than a one pot meal to make life easy.  I had been using a recipe that called for a lot of oil and fat, so I found a better recipe, cut the amount of shellfish (crawfish/shrimp) and meat (especially sausage), used chicken breast instead, and employed brown rice.  Mortal middle aged men can’t eat meatballs and sausage all the time.

Of course the recipe begins with the holy trinity of New Orleans cuisine, onions (2 cups), celery (1 cup), and bell peppers (1 cup) with 1 tsp cayenne pepper and 1 tsp salt in 2 tbl vegetable oil until tender.  Then throw in a half pound of smoked sausage and cook 2 minutes.  Add 5 bay leaves, 2 tbl minced garlic, and 2 cups peeled and seeded tomatoes.  Then add 2 cups brown basmati rice and stir for 2 minutes.  This will make it thirsty for the next ingredient.

Add 5 cups chicken broth and 1 pound chicken breast, cut into pieces.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat to low/medium low and simmer for 35 minutes.  Turn off heat and rest on stove for 15 minutes.  Trust Jesus for a good jambalaya.

For such a simple recipe, this jambalaya boasted a great flavor.  The chicken was cooked perfectly, so tender it seemed poached.  The rice cooked up nicely, and the brown rice worked surprisingly well in this recipe.  Garnish with chooped green onions and copious hot sauce.  Only a good football game will divert your glance from your food.

Let’s face it, the Tampa Bay area can’t get enough good Mexican cuisine.  For years, the middling Mexican food in our metropolitan area left us awash in bad margaritas and blankets of oily orange cheese.  The increasing Mexican population in the the bay area has brought a few good places, but has yet to stabilize.  Sometimes our bashful suburban dwellers need to experience ethnic food “once removed” from its rustic roots.

Mekenita (once known as Mariposa) is casual, the prices are reasonable, and the decor is kinda groovy.  “Chef Rand and Tiffany Packer” have created a manageable business model, with a simple menu and solid flavors.  For squeamish suburbanites and fans of the flavors of Mexico, Mekenita is definitely several notches above Chipotle or Tijuana Flats.  To raise this restaurant further, a couple details should be addressed.

The salsa bar is appreciated.  The best variety was surely the guajillo salsa (center), made from the tough, dark chile found in Mexico.  It is tangy, with enough spiciness to keep me interested.

I have a major weakness for tamales (among many other things), so I ordered one of Mekenita’s Oaxaca style tamales with mole.  The smoked pork adds wonderful deep notes to the mole sauce and tender masa.  I must commend chef Rand on the presentation.  Very little of the mole pool on this plate remained two minutes after serving.

The “crispy tiger shrimp salad” was a rather unfortunate affair.  See those weird slugs sitting on a lump of refried beans and rice?  Those are the shrimp, which were more spongy than crispy.  There is ostensibly a salad under this mess.  I was hoping for an actual salad, with no rice and no refried beans.  Make it lighter and brighter.  When you want shrimp, you don’t want these lumpen beasts.  When you order a salad, you don’t want a burrito in a bowl.

The enchilada special was quite good, but i soon tired of the sauce, which was plenty tangy but could have used more body.  Although I’ve quibbled about some of the details, Mekenita’s does a good job, and I look forward to trying more of their food.  I’ll post an update soon.

I’m in the final throes of writing and editing the Columbia Spanish Restaurant’s Centennial history and cookbook, but it isn’t all solitary toil. I tried out a few of the restaurant’s recipes at a recent cookout, and the results were impressive. For a simple gathering, I chose to make the Mojito Chicken and Rice and Corn, with grilled asparagus on the side.

For the rice, simply cook onions in a little bacon fat and add the corn and rice. Use the liquid from the canned corn with broth.  When the rice is finished, add the crumbled bacon and stir. I made the mistake of trying to stretch the recipe a bit by adding 50% more rice. While it was tasty, I will follow the recipe next time.

The chicken’s marinade is mojo with plenty of lime juice and fresh mint added. While the chicken got started on the grill, I made the simple glaze of sugar, water, mint, lime, and rum by boiling and thickening it. The sweet, fragrant, and sour mixture heightens the grilled chicken flavor admirably. It is easy to see why the dish is a popular special at the Columbia restaurant.  I gave the cooked chicken a final brush with the glaze before serving. The grilled chicken has a caramelized mojito crust.

I finally got a grilling basket for fish and vegetables. It sure helps with the asparagus. The bottom of the basket sheltered the veggies from the harshest heat and I toss them as if they were in a pan, making it much easier to cook them la dente.

Wake up your chicken with the Columbia Spanish Restaurant’s great recipe. My centennial history of the restaurant (kind of like the Sopranos, except with less bullets and more food) is due out in Summer/Fall 2009, to be published by the University Press of Florida. I’ll leave it at that tonight and discuss it in more depth another time.

The University of South Florida is happily announcing the opening of the new student center and some eateries there, but it is more of the same.  I was especially disappointed by Beef O’ Brady’s.  Stick to the wings, Beef people.   I prefer to spend my money at independent restaurants, and there are none to be found at USF.

Nothing on campus comes close to Pho Quyen, an excellent Vietnamese restaurant just across 30th street. A little farther down Fowler Avenue, Trang Viet Cuisine paved the way, introducing Tampa to Vietnamese food in the early 1990s. They are among the best Vietnamese restaurants in the Tampa Bay metro region. My only complaint is that deciding where to eat can be difficult. In the USF area, that is a great problem to have.

Over the years, I’ve eaten at and evaluated both of the restaurants many times. They might not have known it, but both restaurants have waged a great struggle to win my business. I’m the best five customers they have. Here then is a review of the bout, all ten championship rounds of it. I will score the individual rounds, but there is no point in declaring a winner or loser. I love both restaurants, and the struggle for my constituency continues.

Trang Viet opened up his namesake restaurant in the early 1990s, long before most people in Tampa knew the first thing about Vietnamese food. He wisely honed his menu for the conservative, squeamish American palate, leaving the beef tendons and tripe out of his pho, and offered a myriad of vegetarian and vegan dishes. Pho Quyen doesn’t pull as many punches. The food is more saucy, spicy, and robust, while Trang’s relies less on seasoning. Both approaches are perfectly delicious, and are largely a question of mood. Trang’s very reasonable lunch specials are tough to resist, about $6.50-$7 for soup, appetizer, and entree. A friend of mine sometimes says that Trang’s portions aren’t quite big enough. But at prices that low, one could easily order two lunch specials for under $15. Sometimes we do just that.

Round 1: Service and ambiance

Trang’s boasts the most attentive and helpful service. Trang himself is a treasure, and answers questions, suggests wine pairings, helps plan special meals, and sometimes gives away free portions of his latest kitchen creations. Pho Quyen’s service is usually fine. But the restaurant is rather sprawling, and the servers are responsible for too many tables. It can be especially difficult to get water or drinks refilled. In a state as hot as Florida, the kindness of a cold drink should not be underestimated.

There is little point in comparing the ambiance of the competitors, as they are both in plain strip malls, but I find Trang’s more airy and pleasant, especially during the day. Still, Pho Quyen has one major advantage: booths. Winner: Trang.

Round 2: Rolls

Pho Quyen’s rolls are excellent.  The fried spring rolls stand out.  Don’t forget the veggies on the side.  I like to wrap a roll in lettuce with the shredded carrot and jicama.

While I prefer Pho Quyen’s spring rolls, Trang offers three other seasons to choose from.  The autumn (bottom) and winter rolls (top) are my favorites.  The autumn roll’s hot grilled shrimp and pork are paired with cool lettuce, herbs, and pineapple.  The winter roll is both light and hearty, with shredded jicama salad, eggs, sausage, and ground peanuts.  Winner: Trang

Round 3: Appetizers

In the realm of appetizers, Trang has distinct advantages, and his salads are just the beginning.  Pho Quyen has a nice meatball appetizer with tomato sauce and French bread.  Trang offers better appetizers, including his Four Seasons platter, stuffed chicken wings, pork and coconut milk, and calamari.

Among Trang’s most elegant and spicy appetizers are the mussels with a chili and basil sauce.  In this dish, Trang has married his most delicate sensibilities with his spiciest sauce.

Trang’s steamed bun is very simple, with a sweet dough surrounding sausage, ground shrimp and pork, and boiled egg.  This Vietnamese nod to China is essential.

Contrary to my expectations, the buns even look good when torn apart.  Winner: Trang.

Round 4: Pho

In the realm of Pho, Pho Quyen lives up to its namesake dish.  Trang’s is almost too delicate.  Pho Quyen’s broth is more robust and laced with herbs.  The huge bowl is a meal in itself, but based on flavor alone, winner: Pho Quyen.

Round 5: Other Soup

I’ve always enjoyed Trang’s Hieu Thieu wonton soup’s subtle tones of roasted garlic and the luxurious simplicity of his seafood soup.

Once again, however, Pho Quyen has shown its aptitudes with soup.  The flavor of the curried chicken soup is excellent, and the potato chunks make it especially satisfying.  I haven’t had a bad soup at either place, but Pho Quyen’s consistently have more flavor. Winner: Pho Quyen

Round 6: Noodle bowls

You can’t go wrong at either restaurant.  At Trang, the beef with lemongrass is a favorite vermicelli bowl for me.  While it didn’t photograph well, it makes a fine meal.  At Pho Quyen, the grilled shrimp is a real treat, as are the dehydrated onions that garnish every bowl.  The grilled pork and fried spring rolls make for an indulgent bowl.  The pork has especially good flavor.  Bowls with curried chicken bring a more gentle flavor to the proceedings.  Winner: Pho Quyen.

Round 7: Fried Rice

I try to avoid fried rice, but my friend Peterton Crackers is all about it, and I respect his opinion on matters of food.  When asked which restaurant’s he preferred, he answered without hesitation, “Trang’s,” where it is lighter, less greasy, with a better flavor overall.  For an interesting take on fried rice, try Trang’s “Emperor’s Coat,” a tasty combination fried rice covered in a thin blanket of fried egg.  The sausage adds a note of sweetness.  Winner: Trang

Round 8: Vegetarian

Trang has focused a lot of his creative energy on his vegetarian and vegan menus, and cultivated a sizeable meatless clientele.  Although Pho Quyen has its own humble vegetarian section of the menu, it cannot compete with Trang’s diverse offerings.  I can’t say I’ve sampled heavily from any vegetarian menu anywhere, but I’ve had a few of Trang’s meatless options, and they are good.  Winner: Trang.

Round 9: Entrees

This is the toughest category.  Both restaurants shine in the entree department, and the entrees I’ve featured here exemplify the individual style of each place.

The best I’ve had yet at Pho Quyen is the beef with lemongrass and peppers (above).  The sauce is quite spicy, and almost seems Chinese in preparation, even if the spicing is more Vietnamese.  This signature taste is served with other meats as well.  Highly recommended.

Trang’s kitchen is more inventive, with great original dishes. Just try his shrimp sauce over rice noodles some time, his answer to spaghetti and marinara. His version is so light, fragrant and bright that it defies description.  Winner: too close to call.

Round 10: Drinks and desserts

Both restaurants serve a variety of strange Vietnamese beverages, but Trang takes this category with his fried banana dessert: rolled in coconut, wrapped in spring roll skin, and topped with tapioca and ground peanuts.  It tastes delicious wiuthout being too sweet.  Winner: Trang

But this is not the end of this epic conflict.  The struggle for my considerable patronage continues into the championship rounds.  The ultimate winner is anybody’s guess, but these first ten rounds have been a joy to behold.  Please give a round of applause for our Vietnamese pugilists— they are among the very best in the Tampa Bay area.

For some men (and women), food passions especially flare up during football season. Once aroused, these passions are best satisfied with simple food, preferably something you can stuff into your face with your bare hands. The fare must also work as good drinking food, so salads— which do not absorb alcohol— need not apply.

Let’s face it, most food that we associate with sporting events and public gatherings is not the stuff of nutritionists, and should probably only be consumed by athletes themselves, whose metabolism demands massive caloric doses. But dedicated sporting fans generously take one or two for the team. Cheeseburgers. Chili dogs. Fried Chicken wings. Nachos. Pizza. You know the drill.

I’m a Buccaneers fan, but I’m often more excited about the food than the games. It is no wonder that football fans eat and drink so much—- the games last forever and over 2/3rds of the time is devoted to stupid commercials aimed at stupid people. But most football fans are not stupid— at least at the beginning of the game. That’s where the drinks come in. They are especially necessary to tune out or tolerate some of the game hosts and announcers, who are convinced they are MVPs with microphones. The pre-game, in-game, half time, and post-game commentary is so long and exacting as to baffle one’s patience. (remainder of rant deleted) So drinking beer, wine, or liquor at one in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable.

Since football fans are hungry and bored 2/3rds of the time, if i invite friends over to watch a game, we get take out or I cook, and we sometimes feature certain cocktails. (Just ask me about the Gin Rickey incident some time.) So for the 2008-09 football season, I will post game day suggestions for face stuffing and guzzling.

In this first installment, I present marinara subs two ways: sausage or meatball, both hot off the grill.

To make memorable subs, begin by making a fresh marinara sauce. In many cases, canned whole tomatoes have the best flavor, unless you have access to good ripe fresh tomatoes. Drain the canned tomatoes and remove the pulp and seeds.

For a proper Aztec human sacrifice, you must remove the heart while it still beats. Crushing the tomatoes in your hands helps make them more manageable in the pan and works out any extra liquid to shorten your cooking time.

After sauteeing onions and green peppers, add the tomatoes and garlic. Cook until thickened. The photo above shows a thickened sauce. When i push it aside at the top of the photo, it is not runny enough to flow back into place.  After adding some red wine and simmering about ten minutes, I pureed the sauce with an immersion blender.

For good Italian sausage, I went to the Cacciatore brothers’ store on Armenia. I go with sweet or hot, no chicken sausage allowed.  I prefer Castellano and Pizzo’s.  To maximize flavor, I grill peppers and onions for the sandwiches as well. It is amazing how much of the smoky grilled flavor the vegetables can hold. To make their handling much easier, I use skewers. Otherwise, flipping the peppers— and especially the onions, which sometimes fall apart— can be a chore.

My brother Tim mixed up a nice batch of meatballs, using chef Rocco Dispirito’s mother’s recipe. A mild, classic mixture of beef, pork, and veal with some egg, cheese, bread crumbs, and parsley. For a little added flavor, I cooked them gently on the grill. Cooking with too much heat would have left the meatballs with a hard crust and without their tender texture. Besides, they did not have to be completely cooked on the grill— they would simmer in the sauce briefly before serving.

After a quick slumber in the sauce, the meatballs are ready.  For a side dish, I sauteed fresh spinach with raspberry vinegar, small cubes of fresh (“wet”) mozzarella, and pecans.  I serve the subs on Cuban bread, but a more tender bread also works well. They work well as sliders.  A larger, more dressed sandwich is also great, piled with some grilled vegetables and a little parm.

For dessert, Peterton Crackers brought the making of banana splits. A man of appetite, Peterton is known for eating well during the first half of the game, and sleeping during the second. Just one of many ways for football fans to deal with intermittent games swarming with the vain utterances of commercials, hosts and announcers.